Goodbye, My Sweet

I Can Smoke One Cigarette

Posted on: February 18, 2011

If I’m out with friends at a casino that allows smoking, I can smoke one even two cigarettes and not be effected.  I can hold onto a pack of cigarettes for 6 months.  Of course after six months they taste like smoking dirt. But I have had smokers marvel at the fact that I can do this. 

And yet I marvel at those people who can eat one cookie.  Or how about this one: your dinner companion orders a piece of cheesecake, eats three bites then says, “God, I’m full. I can’t eat another bite!” I’d dive across the table and gobble up the rest in one gulp. But that would be impolite.

Why can I smoke but not eat sugar? Why is diet soda even more difficult than sugar? I’ve been watching the various mental disorder shows on tv.  Hoarders is my favorite. Of course I love Celebrity Rehab because who doesn’t love to watch f*cked up celebrities. The newest reality addiction show “My Strange Addiction”.  Is it behavioral or is it physical? Is it both.  I think it’s both. AFter years of eating the wrong things, by brain feels like it would die without sugar and aspartame.  Dr. Drew says that all the time about drugs. Sometimes I do feel like I’ll go absolutely crazy without something sweet even if it is diet soda.

Affirmation: I fill my body with the food it needs. I am strong enough to reject any substance that will harm me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.


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